There are few exceptions of colleagues who may openly tell you how they feel, but most colleagues don’t overtly show their disdain. Still, there are 8 not-so-subtle signs to show that colleages secretly despise you.
1. Gut feeling: Your instinct tells you they don’t like you. If they treat you like you’re not their favorite person then you probably aren’t.
2. Body language: They don’t smile when you’re around. Everyone’s entitled to a bad day, but if they do this all the time they may be making a conscious effort not to like you. There’s no eye contact. Everytime you look at them and try to build honest and meaningful conversation they may look away in fear that you can detect their hostility. There may even be eye-rolling and high school styled behavior.
3. Avoidance: If they avoid you and rush to the toilet or anywhere else just not to be around you then chances are they do not like you. One sign may be that they may take the stairs while you are heading for the elevator just not to be with you. Small talk also grinds to a halt. They may not be interested in your life, your problems and that of your family though they share their news with others. Generally, they may be not acknowledging your presence or just mumble their greeting rather than give it whole-heartedly and in a genuine way.
4. Sabotage: Are your colleagues spreading rumors and creating cliques that are detrimental to your psychology? This childish and unprofessional behavior happens in workplaces as much as it does in high school. If someone doesn’t like you they will begin to say uncomplimentary things to others about you. Chances are this is happening if you notice one colleague grabbing another to tell them “something” in another room. Sounds childish but you’d be surprised at the number of immature people currently circulating in workplace environments! They may think they’re hiding it well but it is usually obvious.
5. Isolation: It’s understandable that you may want to keep a professional distance from co-workers but if you find that you are never invited to social events or aren’t invited to project meetings over coffee then they are sending you a message. Joking around is another way that work relationships are cemented, but if you are not included in office bantering its because your co-workers don’t feel comfortable enough to want you to be ‘one of the team’. WARNING: In Greece, the land of ‘meson’ (contacts) as opposed to meritocracy, in some offices it’s hard to tell if you aren’t being included out of actual dislike or because the others are already chums from before they started working because they were koumbari (best men) or related in some way.
6. Digital communication: Is communication with you primarily digital rather than face-to-face even though you sit next to each other? The shift to digital correspondence is a sign of awkwardness. Have they blocked you from their facebook list? Perhaps they’ve also blocked you from their entire family’s facebook list. Definitely a red flag!
7. Unprofessionalism: If your ideas are continuously gunned down and your thoughts are drowned even before you’ve had a chance to formulate them then their dislike of you is far greater than their interest in a productive working relationship. You may find that your work is undermined or that a colleague may be trying hard to hinder your performance.
8. Lack of trust. Some colleagues may play boss even when they aren’t in a position of authority. Rather than discuss things they may dole out information (e.g. when they plan to take vacation leave) on a need-to-know basis. They may also assume that you’re the office “snitch” and use you as a scapegoat even when you are not to blame. Furthermore, you may feel that your kindness and comaraderie are misinterpreted due to a lack of trust.